food for thought, before I go

Why are people so unbelievably cynical and pessimistic ALL the time? I don't understand it. Yes, we all have our days where everything just goes wrong and we want to get hit by a bus, but all the time? That's just overkill, to the extreme. Especially when it's over something really dumb like, "oh no, I gained 5 pounds." "oh no, my shoes have mud on them." like, REAALLLYYY? Our life expectancy is like, 75 ish. Don't quote me on it, because I'm way too lazy to go look it up. But really, what is so horrible when we're 16 (other than things like life-altering situations, ie, death of a loved one) that is going to completely haunt us the rest of our lives? Yeah, some people have legit reasons that their life is really bad, and I'm sorry for them, but even THEY manage to look up and see the sun sometime or another. But just people who stomp around hating the world over nothing? That's just dumb. If you hate your life so much, change it, and stop complaining people. You're wasting your energy and becoming bitter over little things! Like, smile once in awhile!! That's a pet peeve, constantly cynical and pessimistic people. The glass is half full.

smile, live, laugh,
little jay.

neutral switzerland.

Nothing really happened today, but I did have alittle thinking process.
My friends get mad at me sometimes because I seem to "choose sides", but really, I'm not. I'm the kind of person who will always try to put someone in perspective on what the person they are mad or fighting with is going through. If that makes ANY sense. Heres a little example. Let's say A was mad at B. I was friends with both A and B and heard both sides on what's going on. If A complains about B, I'll say what B is going through. If B complains about A, I'll say what A is going through. I hope that makes alittle more sense. But yes, that is just how I am and what I do. Everyone accuses me of taking the other person's side, but really, I'm not. Nothing is truly ever one-sided, and for things with friends I try to look at the both sides, because really, one of them might be wrong in an area, but the other could be wrong about something else aswell.
LOL, isn't this all confusing? Why do I make it harder on myself.

Anywaaays,
Meh, today was a MEH kind of day. Nothing really exciting, quite boring actually and I have a ton of homework to do, so I better get on it! Crunch time with school now, 10 days until exams.

stay gorgeous,
little jay

long time no see!

Oh my LANTA, I have not blogged in a whoooolee week.

That is kind of berserk, don't you think?
It's because nothing has really been blog-worthy, and then ontop of that I have slightly become sleep deprived and therefore, lazy. And on top of THAT, it's becoming crunch time at school since exams are really soon, which sucks. :(

Anyway, yesterday I took a little trip to Sylvan Lake, which is about an 1 hour or 2 out of the city, and the people we were with were all "YEAH! BEACH!" yes, beach. with snow, and rain. LOL it's kind of sad. We ended up going to some museum about like, the evolution of transportation and all this stuff. I thought it'd be a drag, but in the end, it was actually really cool!

And, the greatest part, I got a bag I've been dyyyiiinngg to have!

This past week, MakeUpByMel on YouTube did a "what's in my going out bag?" and I watched it, despite being illegal to go party yet. Her bag was a grey "Maggie Bag" Clutch, which is made 100% of SEATBELTS! I thought that was the coolest thing ever, and began my search for one. I knew you could order them online, but I don't like getting things online, so I had no idea where to buy this thing. Guess where I found it? IN THE MUSEUM GIFTSHOP! Since the museum was mostly about cars, LOL they had the maggie bag seatbelt clutches! I was so excited, and ended up buying a black and grey two-toned clutch that fits a ton of stuff! It's so pretty, and it's completely recycled! Thousands of seatbelts get thrown in landfills because of discoloration, and I think it's so great that this bag uses them. :) I'm so happy!
I'll definately blog more,

stay goregous,

little jay

http://www.maggiebags.net/

good morning, good morning

So, I'm sorry yesterday was a blogless day, I wasn't really in the mood. :P

Anyway, my last blog mentioned I was de-cluttering my life, and that's what I did. Let me tell you, it feels AMAZING. My room has never been so spotless, and I know where everything is and it's all in its' specific place. It felt great choosing what I wanted and what I didn't want. I gave away alittle less than half of my closet to my neighbours two daughters(they don't have much), and then all the trinkets and stuff I don't want have gone into a box to donate someplace. It feels amazing, I definately believe that's the first step to changing. :) I'll keep you updated on steps as I go along, because of course its' not a one day thing!

Today my cast family is coming over. If you didn't know, this semester our school production was "Back to the 80's: The Totally Awsome Musical!" and I audtioned and got a part as back up singer, which then led me to become a character "Kathy Richardson" which really means, I was Paris Hilton's mom in the 80s! LOL! Everyone in the play became so close we started calling eachother "cast family" and it's true. A diversity of people tried out, and steped out of their comfort zones (I know I did.) and all in all, it was an amazing experience. So since the play is over, we all try to keep in touch at school and hanging out sometimes, this month it's my turn so we can hang out. :) It's going to be awsome. That's another thing that's really good for you, step out of your comfort zone! Yes, sometimes it won't work, but in the end, you just push your boundaries and find out talents you didn't know you had!

I must bid thee all farewell! I have to go set stuff up, and also my english partner is coming over so we can finish our storyboard assignment for "Run Lola Run", which by the way, was an amazing movie. DEFINATELY recommend. :)

stay goregous,

little jay.

Step One. :)

De-clutter your life.

Today, I have dedicated to cleaning out everything I don't need, in the sense of material objects. Call it SPRING CLEANING! Well, it's already called that, nevermind.
Anyway, I've always kind of been a mini-hoarder. It's ridiculous, I keep EVERYTHING. Old Cellphones, certain pieces of papers, etc etc etc etc. I've also had extreme collections. For example, I collect sea shells. :) Now I seem to be hoarding necklaces and sunglasses --WHICH I DON'T EVEN WEAR! (because I hate putting in my contacts!) Alsom my biggest collection is my magazine collection. Yes. Magazines. I'm girly that way. I litearlly have 3 massive stacks of magazines in the corner of my closet! Everything from like.. J-14 (tween magazine, I started early) to French Vogue. Everything in between, that revolves around fashion or gossip. Anyway, I've begun a ramble LOL, my point: I need to take clutter out. This doesn't mean throwing out my magazines, because one day I can have thousands throughout time and show how fashion evolved, since I'm obsessive compulsive that way. But throwing out things I don't need, like my grade 9 french books. Or some of my 8 dictionaries. LOL If not throw it out, then atleast clean it up and organize it in a way where it's not conflicting with space!
This is my first step to figuring myself out, de-cluttering my life. My room is my sanctuary, and I don't want it to look like an explosion anymore. It's a place for myself, and cleaning it up maybe will help me think clearer rather than search everywhere for something. :)
I'll blog later how it went!!
stay goregous,
little jay.


ps, 1 year and 8 months today. <3>

Eyeshadow :)

So, I decided to play around with my eyeshadow today while I'm just chilling out at home,
and I actually made a look I really like. :) My camera quality kind of sucks, but I hope you can see.

It has pink, blue, green and purple in the crease. I used all cheap kind of drug store brand things & I'll type out the products, but since some came in like packages from family as Christmas presents and such, it won't really make sense. But here they are anyway! I'm thinking I'll make a tutorial on it soon, it's actually really simple.

Lid: NB Mineral Shadow "Sweet"
Outter Corner: Green from TENPro (any light green will work)
Centre Lid: Blue from TENPro (any blue works) then to soften it up over the blue i lightly patted on the pigment SOLAR from Annabelle.
Crease: Ardene "Heather Ice" (any violet works!)
Brow Bone: NB Mineral Shadow "Elegant"

** Also I primed my lids with Rimmel London's Cream Eyeshadow "Out of the Blue"

what i do with my time.

LOL

SOOOO..... Before jetting off to work, I decided "oh hey, I want to google myself!" yes, I know. I'm a total loser. LOL I AM ON GOOGLE! Not for this blog, but like, for other things I've done. For example, in 2001 I ran in a little mini-marathon thing. I had completely forgotten about it until now. The times are STILL on the internet!

LOLOL! Came 3rd out of my whole group of 5 people. :)

My Summer Top 10. :)

I've religiously been watching JuicyStar07 on Youtube, and her latest video was a tag on her top 10 summer things. :) I wasn't tagged, but I still want to do it! These arn't in order, they're just in the order that they pop into my head. They arn't all things, LOL heads up.

1. Disstressed Jean Shorts.

yes, these are sooo daisy duke, but I do make my own. :) I also make my own ripped jeans! (maybe i'll make a how-to video one day) But I love how shorts can be dressed nicely, or just to slum around the house. :)

2. Wavy/Curly Hair

For those who know me personally, my hair is naturally curly/wavy. I love having it down and just natural for the summer, it just makes it look beachy and fun. Although I do straighten my hair occasionally, most days, it's just down and wavy. :)

3. Sleeveless Cardigans

I love these to just throw over a t-shirt and shorts, and a big brown belt at the waist. It looks great on my figure and i just love it. :) They're not that expensive, I got mine for $16 at Old Navy!

4. Jane AQUAceuticals Tinted Moisturizer

In the summer, I prefer tinted moisturizers over foundation because it's so lightweight and doesnt just massively sweat off. If you clump foundation, powder, etc etc all on your face, you're going to clog your pores and that means, break out! So during the summer months, I tend to use tinted moisturizers. Same coverage, just lighter and no transfer! PLUS, it has an SPF of 30!!

5. Smashbox "Monarch" Palette

I like my eyeshadow to look kind of natural during the summer, and this palette is great. :) It has six shadows, and they're all neutrals and browns. You can mix them all up, and their pigmentation is amazing. You can always add a pop of colour in it as well!

6. L'Oreal Telescopic Mascara

This mascara does not clump my eyelashes what so ever. I like my eyelashes to look long but not hardcore filled with product, and Telescopic just gives them that "umph". It elongates my lashes, and makes them appear longer, with no clumps! I wear mascara everyday, and this one is hands down one of my favorites. :)

7. Mac Mineralize Skinfinish Natural

When I'm going somewhere where I'll be in the sun all day or swimming, I just like to brush my Mac SkinFinish powder over my face to cover any redness or discoloration I have going on. It's super super light, and covers just as well as any liquid foundation, and lasts all day!

8.V-Neck T-shirts

I like to just chill out in shorts and loosely fitted V-neck t-shirts. They're really comfy, and you can dress them up or down. With shorts for day time, or with a boyfriend blazer and leggings or jeggings for night time. I like to just throw them over my bathing suit when I'm going somewhere to swim or whatever. :)

9. Aveeno Positively Nourishing Leave-In Conditioner

My hair gets super dry when I'm in constant sun light, and this is magic. I also use sunsilk TLC, but this for my ends just make them feel super healthy and smooth. Ever since I started using it a few weeks ago, my hair even LOOKS healthier and feels thicker. It's magic in a bottle, seriously.

10. Neroli Jasmin Body Spray

Finally, I love to smell good. I have an abundant collection of perfumes, but recently I bought my mom this spray from the Body Shop, and she gave it to me since she doesn't use perfumes. It smells soooo goood! Kind of like a mixture of... I don't even know. It's sweet smelling, but like, a little spicy to is that makes any sense. It's heavenly. :)

Stay Goregous,

little jay. :)

realization of the day:

listen to your mother.

My mom always told me, "os amigos so sao de porta de casa para dentro", and she's 100% right. I've always thought that I could prove to my mom, "oh, pft that won't happen to me", but really, she knows me better than anyone. SHE can see through me, not some people who "claim" they can. I should've listened to my mom ages ago, and being stubborn, I had to figure this out the hard way. My mom has an amazing judge of character, and I always go against it thinking that I know best, when really, I figure out that the grass isn't greener where I decided to venture. But regardless, she's there for me, and not to just say "i told you so." She's there, and won't backstab me in the back, or say things that are completely meaningless. I realize that if I take anything for granted, it's her, no one else. I'm lucky to have her, and it's hard that I figured this out so late, but now I know where to go from here.

listen to your mom!
little jay

one last thing,

I found this poem by Emily Dickinson. It might just be my favorite piece of poetry I've seen in my life.

Hope is the Thing with Feathers

Hope is the thing with feathers
The perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all,

And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
The could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.

I've heard it in the chilliest land
And on the strangest sea;
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me.
-Emily Dickinson

I love this. Love love love love love love love love love loveeeee!

highschool

Highschool feels like a waste of time. Going in, someone told me that it would either be the best 3 years of my life, or the worst. If I had to divide the days up into good or bad, most would fall into the bad pile, so overall being it's becoming the worst 3 years of my life. I can legitimately say, with every ounce of my body that I hate highschool. It's so filled with unnecessary drama, it's so filled that it overflows everywhere and frankly, it becomes ridiculous. Completely and undoubtedly ridiculous. Really, it's one of the reasons why I want to transfer out anyway. Home schooling would have been a good option too, but I am literally the worst procrastinator on this planet. I think I'm just going to throw all this negativity away, and "suck the poision" out of my life, and focus on my exams coming up, ESPECIALLY MATH. In the summer, I can focus on earning some money for a trip to NYC Spring Break '11, and on getting fit like hit up the gym and stuff. I have a big to-do list I want to tackle, and no way am I letting this summer be like my last one. I'm going to keep myself busy, and make it productive, :)

Positive thought of the day! It's goooooregous outside today, spent my double spare going to the park and then sitting on a hill, :) so sunny and strange for us to be having this weather. But I'm not complaining! Mother Nature, keep bringin on the sunshine. :)

I'm off to do everything I have to do this afternoon, maybe if I have time I'll come back and blog again. :)

stay goregous,
little jay

New Trend?

I don't understand this new kind of phenomenon of kids having kids. I'm 16 and really, I don't think I'd ever personally be able to raise a child at this age, or even be in labour. (my pain toleranec is non-existant). I mean, I'm not being judgemental about it or condesending really but I just don't understand why instead of someone living their childhood, PLAN for them to having babies at this age. Even 11 year olds, believe it or not! They're in like Grade 6, and they're having kids. I also know that the age to lose your virginity has dropped to like, what, 14 15? instead of 17 18? Really? I do want to be a young mom, but when I say YOUNG, I mean like... early 20's! I'm not criticizing in any way because I personally know some people who have had a kid my age, or is currently pregnant, but I just really don't understand it.

Anyway, :) Today was my dance competition and our group, "Go Hard or Go Home" placed silver with a choreography award. :) Quite proud of us. I danced my hardest today, and soon it'll all be over but it was a good year. :)

excitement!

So I'm uber excited that I'm getting over this blog noob-ness. :)
It's slowly coming together, but of course having like, A.D.D, I want to put a bazillion things on here! I have a few projects in mind, and I'll let you know soon enough!!
Eeeeeek! :)

stay goregous,
little jay! :) :) :)

caution: rant & swearing.

I don't get it sometimes. I'm really really trying to be optimistic this week, because so far it's been pretty bad. I kind of feel like I should've switched schools when I had the chance after first semester. I'm trying to change into a better person, I really am. I've come to the conclusion that I have a bad impulse that I've named "devil bitch" (sorry for the language) to just be well, a bitch. I don't think people get what I'm trying to do. So, I just DON'T text people anymore is becaues they always, always, always, always, always take things I say the opposite way. A few of my friends have said that being my friend is pure torture. That hurt like a bitch. I've hammered out the issues with one, but everything still seems to be my fault no matter what I try to do. I'm coming to the point that I'm going to just give up, keep my mouth shut, bite my tongue and wait until graduation next year. I feel as if I'm always apologizing for something, but then when it comes around, people yell at me saying I never apologize, or when I do apologize I don't mean it. I'm a micrometer away of just giving up, and I mean it. Anyway, on the bright side, :) it's a gorgeous day here. Sun and everything. I think I'm going to go take my dog for a walk, study for a bit then maybe blog again, fix it up.

stay goregous,
little jay.

373 days (roughly) until I graduate.
It can't be that hard, right?

first blog post ever, YAY!

So as usual, I'm procrastinating on my homework. Math 30 Pure. For those of you who don't know what that means due to different education systems, it's the math level you learn in grade 12 or the year before you graduate. Trigonometry I & II, Logarithms, all that beautiful stuff. I really should work on it, but I thought "hey, lets make a blog post to the brand-spankin-new blog!" because let's face it: math is just boring.

ANYWAY, let me tell you alittle bit about myself. :)

My name is Joana Antunes, and I am 16 years old. Grade 11, in highschool. Sorry buds, you don't get to know where ;). I love to draw, paint, or art in general. I also love to sketch clothes and imagine myself as a fashion designer! But the problemo is, I do not get inspired. It takes a whole great deal to inspire me, and then the inspiration lasts for like, 5 minutes, and then it fizzles away to an empty page. From that, it just completely demonstrates how I might have the lowest attention span known to man. I also love love love love love love love love love x every single number in the world, LOVE fashion. How someone can come up with a whole line of clothing that portrays something and show it on a runway and make people fall inlove with it and wear it in their day to day life. It's amazing, just fashion and art in general, how so many amazing things can simply come out of imagination. Another thing, I love dance. Since I'm uncoordinated I only stick to doing hip hop (whaddup G?? LOL jk!) but I wish on a star that I could dance contemporary, or modern. The idea that someones body can move so fluidly and in perfect harmony to a piece of music just gives me the heebie geebies (the good ones, don't worry.). Poetry is another thing that I love to do, but again, because of the non-inspired thing going on, I don't write that often. :( Anyways, I think I should maaayybeee dust off my math textbook and get my brain thinking on Trigonometry II Identities! YAY! not.

stay goregous,
- little jay. :)

PS, little jay because, I am petite, and almost dwarf sized. it's quite sad.
PPS, I'm a noob at this blogging stuff, don't laugh!