An unrealistic amount of relationships are fake now a days, friendships are taken for grated, people use dating as an excuse for sex or comfort or a security blanket. Maybe I'm old fashioned, but sweetheart, your relationship isn't going to work if you're not going to be real with yourself, and the other person: be it friend, boyfriend, cousin, pupil. That shit is not happening. To be real, you have to be you. None of that happy sappy bullshit, where you pretend you are the supremely confident supermodel type who can speak 12 languages, but the girl who is down to earth, has her insecurities (we're girls. we all have them, fess up) and hell if you can speak 12 languages, props to you. I speak two and still have word dyslexia.
You can't build a relationship off bullshit, you can try, but it won't work... and if it works for awhile, it won't work forever. Hate to break your happiness bubble. You have to be truthful to the other person, maybe you don't have to tell them about your past (we all have something we're not proud of), but don't pretend to be something your not because that just leads into that other person falling inlove/liking this person you have now created, and when you get tired playing dress up, they're just like wtf? Who is this girl? To be yourself with this said person, first of all, you have to KNOW who you are. Thirteen-year-olds, lets face it, you don't know what you're doing at 13. I was the most messed up kid at 13, I wanted to be emo-sob-about-my-life-and-how-horrible-it-is, but then spontaneously wanted to become a fashion designer. Now here I am, 18 and neither. Maybe your relationship will last at 13, my parents did. But that's also my parents. This isn't the olden days anymore, our priorities are effed up.
So now that we know who we are, secondly, KNOW WHAT YOU WANT. Do you want the Marilyn Manson type? Leonardo DiCaprio? Do you want a Hugh Heffner-kinda guy who'll leave you millions when he dies? But please, make this decision realistically. There is only one Matthew Mcconaughey in our world, and he's busy and most likely taken. Once you know that, you won't fall into the arms of the countless other dudes who are just so wrong for you, and who leave you bawling your eyes out and pigging out on Ben and Jerrys. Saves you tears, time AND those extra 15 lbs you would gain then later cry over. For friendships, don't have these unrealistic expectations and expect everyone to be perfect. People make mistakes, we're human not robotic.
And lastly, don't make relationships your security blanket. No one wants a stage 5 clinger, neither as a girlfriend or best friend. We need oxygen to breathe, kinda hard when you're taking it all up in my bubble...
There you go. Summary?
1. KNOW WHO YOU ARE
2. KNOW WHAT YOU WANT
3. DON'T BREATHE OTHER PEOPLES OXYGEN -- just kidding. But seriously. No stage 5 clingerness.
amen.
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